March 06, 2008

Are you a desperate homedebtor thinking of burning your debt-trap down? Do the new housing scam - blame it on the "ELF"!!!


Most of you probably saw this story of new McMansions in Seattle burning to the ground the other day, where the arson was made to look like it was done by environment protesters - the ELF or Earth Liberation Front.

My ass.

You're going to see homes going up in flames all over the US the next few years - new builds and also existing homes. Desperate times call for desperate measures and nobody is more desperate than a Desperate Homedebtor looking at bankruptcy, foreclosure and financial disaster.

Just leave behind a "ELF" banner, and you're good to go!

Hunt is on: Who torched the Street of Dreams?

Working with few clues, federal investigators face a daunting task as they try to determine whether a shadowy group of radical environmentalists torched three multimillion-dollar homes along a Street of Dreams in Snohomish County on Monday.

Although a spray-painted banner left at the scene contained the initials of the Earth Liberation Front, it took nearly a decade of groundwork in a previous case before investigators cracked a Pacific Northwest cell of the ELF responsible for more than a dozen arsons beginning in 1996.

The homes gutted in Monday's inferno had drawn tens of thousands of people last summer who paid to gawk at their architecture, interiors and sheer size.

39 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't think I'd want to attract the FBI's attention by doing that...

Anonymous said...

Like invading Iraq and blaming it on al-quaeda

Andrew Hac said...

Dubya Shrub + Penis Shooter = "Little Boy" + "Fat Man"

This nation and its Americano citizen is as toasted as a snapper turtle skewered on a Chinese bamboo stick from mouth to ass all sizzling, sputtering, roasting nicely, juices dripping, fat popping over a bed of white hot charcoal grill.

Americano = Grilled Snapper Turtle

Heeeee... Haaaaa... Arrrrr...

So, tell me, does the average Americano take it enough in the rear orifice yet by the forceful penetration of "Little Boy" + "Fat Man", or do you want more "Enter The Dragon" ?

Americano = Being Entered By The Dragon up the Kazook
"BORKAFATTY" AKA The Pig is swallowing, roosting, snouting, chomping at the maggot feed trough.

Heeeee... Haaaaa... Arrrrr...

And all of you retards, ass-head that voted for SHRUB and worshipped his ASS over the last 8 years, guess what, the chicken are coming home to roost on your head-ass. The ancient snapper turtle probably have more brain cell than you and your children combined together. Are you sorry yet ? Do you feel ashamed and stupid about your shallow thinking, narrow-minded love and swoon for DUBYA ? Do you, do you, do you ???

Ed said...

So now every fire fire in the country will be arson. Once again Keth goes to the overly paranoid side of the ledger.

Anonymous said...

Yes, It would make sense to blame a know group like ELF. They the police will be looking of little ELF types and not the guy holding the bag.

Melody said...

I thought the same thing as you did as I was watching the news. There will lots of arson, that's for sure.

Anonymous said...

I thought the same thing ELF comes out after years of hiding just in time to save the subprime owners. Yaaa Right.....

Afterthought said...

The question is how is this playing in Washington state? Are their HP fellow travelers who are help the Keystone Cops and good ol' boy District Attorneys actually investigate arson?

What about the insurance contract? Is there a "terrorism" provision?

Justice must be done!

thomas jefferson said...

Uh, no. The houses that burned were the models, not mortgage traps.

Buzz Saw said...

If the builders did it then it is okay, if the ELF did it then it is terrorism. Ooh, spooky.

Hexagonal said...

Yep. First thing I thought of when I heard the story on the radio.

Maybe we could merge the real and the fake, though: maybe ELF and Earth First! could offer their services for hire. Unfortunately contributions to them for this wouldn't be tax-deductible, since the money used must be for exempt purposes: one of the bars to be met is that the action has to be legal.

DinOR said...

According to some of the posters in Seattle... they were actually LAST year's Street of Dreams homes! The only one where the detonation "failed" (was in the (1) home that was actually under contract.

With Tre Dickhead being cuffed and stuffed BACK to the U.S (Portland) to face multiple charges, things are a little "hot" for ELF to be pulling off a stunt like this, dontcha' think?

I'm no expert at body language but when they interviewed the builder, well let's just say as a father of two (I know feigned anger when I see it!) o.k?

Rom said...

Blaming vandals in an old trick. Maybe this was the ELF and maybe it wasn't. I'm always suspicious with the vandals claim. In our high school (years ago) we had work being in the theater. The workers damaged the scrim (a white curtain) so the spray painted a rival schools name on the scrim and claimed it was vandals.

BURNupski & BLAZENheimer said...

Bull market in Arson.

NOW is the Time.

GOT ARSON?

Anonymous said...

My favorite is that it is considered "domestic terrorism."

Domestic terrorism, what a crock. Domestic terrorism is nothing more than violent protest - which I am sure all of you know, was used by the founders of this country.

Mammoth said...

Keith,

From my March 4th post on the "Angry Sheeple" thread...
------------------
"Yesterday in Woodinville, WA, some activists burned down a couple of brand-new McMansions. Supposedly, this was the work of the Earth Liberation Front (ELF). Try Googling the news articles and read for yourself!

Who really knows who the true culprit was? Can't make the mortgage on your Mcmansion? Just torch it, and plant an ELF sign or two in the vicinity.

Hey - this topic may just deserve its own thread!

-Mammoth
March 04, 2008 3:15 PM"
------------------
But hey - that's okay - you don't need to credit your blog's posters for where your ideas for threads come from, right?

Anonymous said...

UGGGHHH....I got caught reading a sentence of andrew hac's drivel until I realized it. Thank GOD he uses his name each time so I can gingerly skip it over.

On topic - the arson probably has nothing to do with foreclosures/whatever.

Anonymous said...

I must have missed a step somewhere. Burning down your house doesn't make the debt go away. You might get some money to rebuild it, but that's unlikely to be anything close to what it cost unless you bought it a long time ago. You can't blow town with the dough either, because I think the money goes straight to the lender. So in the end all it does is make your monthly expenses go up by the amount of rent you now have to pay on new digs.

Anonymous said...

Your a stupid ass. These ELF wacko's have been committing domestic terrorism here in the Northwest for the past few years.

Maybe it has something to do with a couple of these commies being on trial right now?

Anonymous said...

I hope those ELF 'tard's left their rotten DNA on those bed sheets...

Veronica Lodge said...

RE: Are you a desperate homedebtor thinking of burning your debt-trap down?

Why burn down your house when you can live in it for FREE?

This Live-Free program helps everyone concerned:

1. Home debtors are no longer burdened with huge mortgage payments.

2. The money not spent on mortgags is now spent on consumer goods. This makes the economy prosper.

3. Stiffed banks can always get extra cash from the Federal Reserve -- no collateral needed.

The bottom line is that everyone wins!

V.L.

Anonymous said...

Or leave a copy of the Koran at the scene and blame it on Al Qaeda.

Daphne64 said...

The article says the builder who owned one home had TURNED OFF THE SECURITY CAMERA, and the builder who owned another one had turned off the burgler alarm.

What a coincidence!

Anonymous said...

grandma pkk here--

Yes the houses were models; still needed to be sold. Hard to find high end mortgages right now. The builder could have been strapped for cash. Not saying it was the builder, but I am pretty sure in various arson cases it will be.

Anonymous said...

I'm going to guess that ELF will take the fall, regardless of guilt or innocence. Bush's crony homebuilder buddies will get a big fat insurance check for properties they never would have sold and the feds will have an excuse to increase their budget and expand domestic wiretapping. It's a win/win for the robber barons in charge.

Anonymous said...

Most likely the developer did it. They have the most to gain (insurance money).

Chief Elf said...

There aren't many forms of real protest & displeasure with big money's footsteps destroying our environment. Maybe this will be the poster child for the last 7 years of wild excess. I'm for ELF, Jingle mail, financial services bankruptcies and corporate failures. Maybe after a few years of excising the excess out of our society, we can get back to building a real America again. 3 cheers for GWB, you'll go down in history as our worst President in history with little debate!

Anonymous said...

I remember when I was in high school back in the 70s, that when the Oil Crisis started, a lot of those huge station wagons that got about 10 mpg went up in flames.

Anonymous said...

This just in and without Vaseline, just like Republican Mark Foley likes it:

AP -- Home equity slips below 50%
Federal Reserve says homeowners' debt on their houses exceeds their equity for the first time since 1945.

Americans' percentage of equity in their homes has fallen below 50 percent for the first time on record since 1945, the Federal Reserve said Thursday.

Moody's Economy.com estimates that 8.8 million homeowners, or about 10.3% of homes, will have zero or negative equity by the end of the month. Even more disturbing, about 13.8 million households, or 15.9%, will be "upside down" if prices fall 20% from their peak.


http://tinyurl.com/39cnrd

upthecreek said...

These toilets had been on the Market since last summer 2007 ... NOT one of them had sold... I wonder maybe the builder had a change of heart

ELF ==empty liabilty fund...

anon666 said...

I suspect that there is going to be a sudden rash of unsolved 'ELF' arsons across the nation.

eric in vegas said...

"I remember when I was in high school back in the 70s, that when the Oil Crisis started, a lot of those huge station wagons that got about 10 mpg went up in flames."

You're going to see a lot more SUVs sitting on dubs go up in flames. I wouldn't be surprised to see the cost to insure an SUV skyrocket as the price of gas continues to rise.

Anonymous said...

Seriously, Is there actually a "terrorist cluase" in insurance policies??

Anonymous said...

makes sense that you tools think ELF is non-existent. after all al-qaeda is a myth and 9/11 was all an inside job. oh and the moon landing was fake too.

QWEEFER, what the fuck happened to your blog? used to be a discussion on housing/economics. now it has turned into nutjob central.

Anonymous said...

In Chicago we have a word for this (assuming arson): Greek Lightning. It refers to the insolvent Greek restaurant that has a mysterious fire. No reason that the builder, unable to sell the sport utility homes and a homedebtor writ large, won't be tempted especially with a convenient scapegoat eco-group.

Even better, anon throwaway cell phones make "taking credit" easy in the name of the scapegoat group. With multiple scapegoatable groups to choose from the arsonist has quite a menu.

Banana Republicrat said...

I just love the fact that these were 4,000sqft suburban "green" homes. The twisted logic of green consumption is akin to people "saving money" on horribly overpriced homes that have been reduced.

Anonymous said...

does anyone have any proof that the owner was under distress or is this a site for paranoid kooks now?

Lost Cause said...

Nero blamed the Christians, and Bush blamed al Queda. Both were urban renewal projects.

Anonymous said...

MLF - no not that MiLF - there are plenty of other websites devoted to those MiLFs - I'm talking about a newly enraged and aroused group known as MLF - the Mortgage Liberation Front.

There's an old joke about two fellows on a cruise relaxing and enjoying some leisure time.

1st fellow to 2nd fellow: So how did you come to be on this cruise?

2nd to 1st: Well its really very fortunate actually, our home was destroyed in a fire, no one was hurt thank gosh. The insurance proceeds are replacing the house and there was enough left over to go on this cruise.

2nd to 1st: Wow - glad it all worked out - and what a coincidence because our home was destroyed in a flood and we also had enough leftover insurance proceeds to enjoy this luxury cruise.

1st to 2nd: That is a remarkable coincidence. By the way just how in the hell do you start a flood?

Keith: Long-time reader - I do not enjoy where the country is going but I do enjoy your trenchant commentary and mordant wit!

Signed

A. Fan