February 13, 2008

Fun stuff at dirtyscottsdale - mortgage brokers leaving 3% tips at stripjoints and a steroid-using freakshow 'property developer' poser in London




Here's a couple funny updates from dirtyscottsdale, the most guilty pleasure on the internets.

1) How do you know times are tough for the mortgage brokers? They're only leaving 3% tips in Scottsdale strip joints. One more knock-on effect from the mortgage meltdown - watch for strip joints to close up shop now that the mortgage broker money has dried up, right when the supply of strippers skyrocketed too (with the REIC layoffs)...

"Ladies please note, since guys already know this fact: 30K Millionaires= Mortgage Brokers.- nik"

2) Read the hilarious series of posts about materialism-defined Scott Alexander, aka "Frog" from the UK - too funny! But now it's kinda serious, as he threatens Nik with death and violence. Comes with the territory, I should know, but it looks like this roid-rage poser freakshow means business.

You'll love the description of the overpriced condo he's trying to sell in Manchester. Why does this guy remind me of our fraudster David Crisp (without the juice)?

"Alexander Signature Homes, under the direct project management of Scott Alexander, design truly one off bespoke accommodation using only the finest fixtures and furnishings, creating a truly unique “A” list finish to the property, only when the property has surpassed all expectations will it then be worthy of Scott Alexander’s personal signature…."

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey! Stop dissing one of Frank's number one clients!

happy homeowner in the stix said...

You guys have to check out the Scott Alexander website before you comment...especially the "properties" page.

I haven't had a good laugh like that in ages!

Anonymous said...

Do you get free steroids with the condo?

Anonymous said...

The last time a tough guy from Manchester came to kick some American ass, he was KTFO! Just ask Ricky Hatton. Floyd Mayweather rules.

Marky Mark said...

If I owned a bar and some guy just spent nearly $700 dollars there (you know at least 50% is profit) but left a lousy tip - I would NOT be complaining in these times. I would just make up the tip money to the girls and keep him as a very good PAYING customer...

Marky Mark

tater said...

I could never buy the condo. But, I would like to walk through it. I would bring my dog with me, and let him piss all over that white couch.

I must admit that I would have a hard time deciding about one thing though: I don't know whether to let my dog shit in that fancy shower or on that nice British wool carpet. My dog has had the diarrhea lately, so it ain't gonna be a pretty sight (or smell).

The agent wouldn't forget this "showing".

Anonymous said...

Oh my God... that guy's web site. The world needs a good Depression to wash turds like that down the toilet.

Anonymous said...

I think Mr Steroid is in a spot of trouble after this threat. How professional! Watch yo back keith brother!


http://www.thedirty.com/?p=11509

Sir I was hoping I was not going to have to contact you like this but I want to introduce myself. My name is Scott Alexander aka #1 and I am the gentleman you have smeared all over your website in London and New Jersey. It appears as though my assistant Tony aka “The Nuts” in the States has been writing you standing up for me and I appreciate his support and vigor. As you may or may not know I am an international fitness guru and supermodel. I am an international celebrity and to myself image is everything. I have recently shot for a romance novel cover which will be published both in the UK and the US. Although my approach and Tony’s to your website may differ my views of what you are doing coincide with my assistant Tony. Tony may not be an educated man, be he has heart and will kick your limey ass in a fight, that I am sure of. I think you are a scrawny little man and your readers are a bunch of overweight jealous Americans. It is true; the UK mafia has asked me in the past to be there “muscle” both in NYC and here in London. I Scott Alexander refused to work with them but feel if I called in a favor, it would be answered. Be a man Nik, I will fly you to my gaff in Manchester so you can drive my cars and sleep with my women. I have the money, power, connections and willingness to crush your scrawny American ass both physically and financially. I buy and sell the likes of people like you everyday in my world. The authorities in America do not scare me, Tony could f*ck you up. He is just waiting on my ring but I am a professional so I am sure we can fix this over tea. Your jealousy shows through like most Americans. I will not let you damage the image I have built. I am not a f*cking frog! Take the f*cking pictures down or my whole crew will come at you from all angles. I don’t give two f*cks about your American police, they can’t stop me from following you into a pub and throwing your ass around like a rag doll. Think about that next time you want to put my picture up. Is it worth it knowing who I am, who Tony is, and what we can do to you. You can’t hide from Scott Alexander. I hope this puts this issue to rest or I may have to put you to rest….forever.

Anonymous said...

Hey Frog !
You LOSE !

Anonymous said...

There was a question on here the other day about when we realized there was a bubble. My experience coincides with this article. I was at a strip club one night back in 06, talking with the "dancer" and she said she danced at night and was a mortgage broker by day. I thought, now isnt that interesting. I am not sure which came first the dancing or the broker biz, but either way, I new something was up.

Anonymous said...

I have the borrowed money, imaginary power, nebulous connections and leased Lambos to crush your scrawny American ass both physically and financially in my dreams. I will crush your head... crush your head. Do you hear me?

Tangelo Mozilo said...

Holy crap! I've never seen such shameless self-promotion in my life. I bet this Snot Anderson guy refers to himself in the third person when he talks.

I think I will also start a shameless self-promotin website, featuring my scrawny farmer's-tanned physique against the backdrop of my exotic '98 Malibu or my opulent '75 Chevy C-10. Perhaps I can model my tinfoil hat collection and talk about the commodity ETFs that meet my exacting standards of approval. I will undoubtedly need plenty of server space for the link to my fan site.

Got ego?

Anonymous said...

Hey Keith, check this one out:

www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com

It's hilarious.

Frank@Scottsdale-Sucks.com said...

What people who haven't lived in Scottsdale don't know is the garbage on that website is all true and that's the kind of human scum you have to wade through day in and day out living in Scottsdale!!

The two times I've been back in the past year since moving, I'm basically in culture shock and realize just how bad it is there. It's easy to forget once you're gone.

dropthesoapImrightbehindyou said...

That Manchester condo would drive you crazy. How can anyone live like that? It looks like a coked out gay disco.

Anonymous said...

Which high school did this Scott guy drop out of? He's certainly not '#1' in spelling, punctuation, and basic english grammar.

Budvar said...

"The last time a tough guy from Manchester came to kick some American ass, he was KTFO! Just ask Ricky Hatton"

Oh yeah, is that what you call payback for when Jon Bon Jovi came over here and a 15yo girl beat him up and nicked his leather jacket?

WINGS said...

Dude looks like a major tool.

Dude exudes cheese.

Dude is emblematic of all that is wrong with Western Civ.

Dude looks like he's on his way to liver damage from too much "juice."

Ha, ha!

He makes me laugh. I love the self-important egoism run amok/

Anonymous said...

dude needs a blouse

Anonymous said...

Douche of Earl.

Frank@Scottsdale-Sucks.com said...

We went up to Hollywood tonight to see a show and even the poser d-bags there aren't 1/10th as bad as the sh*t contaminating Scottsdale.

Anonymous said...

This freak is White Goodman from the "Dodgeball" movie.

Anonymous said...

BudVar - There's only one Ricky Hatton, one Ricky Hatton!
Is the bitch still crying over the whoopin' he took?

Anonymous said...

Are you deliberately refusing to correct your mistake? He didn't leave a 3% tip, he left a 3% tip of the total bill, which included a large "gratuity." His total gratuity was about a hundred dollars.

Anonymous said...

fucking fat yank wankers love to hear you say that to his face!! go eat some fuckin doughnuts