April 01, 2008

FLASH: ANGELO MOZILO OF COUNTRYWIDE ARRESTED


Los Angeles (AP) - Angelo Mozilo, the founder, chairman and CEO of Countrywide Mortgage, the nation's largest mortgage lender, who says he committed no crimes at the scandal-ridden mortgage company, has been indicted on criminal charges and will be taken into custody later today, The Associated Press has learned.

The FBI and SEC have had Mozilo and Countrywide under investigation for various charges including insider stock trading, knowingly enabling mortgage fraud and various Sarbanes-Oxley violations for months, and the indictment was expected.

"The arrest of Angelo Mozilo if true is the beginning of the end for the corrupt Real Estate Industrial Complex" said NAR Chief Economist Lawrence Yun reached today by the AP in a phone interview. "We at the National Association of REALTORS(R) hope to see all of the guilty parties rounded up, including our disgraced former Chief Economist, David Lereah, along with most of our 1.2 million members. Mozilo should be just the start."

FBI spokesman Lirpa Loof would not confirm or deny the indictment, but did say that the FBI is actively pursuing investigations against thousands of mortgage lenders, bankers, realtors, appraisers and housing gamblers. He added that the FBI is delaying announcing indictments until the investigations can tie all of the companies, con artists and fraud back to the suspected mastermind and chief cause of the housing bubble and crash, Casey Serin of California, and that yes this was a parody AF.

57 comments:

Anonymous said...

you effing prick

Anonymous said...

lipra loof!

Anonymous said...

Goddammit... ya had me going. The sad thing is, for a few seconds there, i was thinking to myself "hey, things are happening the way they should, maybe this country isnt so bad after all"

Oh well. maybe they will get him...in 10 years.

Anonymous said...

Finally.


Just for YOU Keith. You've been calling this for some time now. Years actually.

Great stuff Keith. I think they are listening when you speak buddy.

Dny

Casey Serin said...

I'd also like to emphasize that I am straight as an arrow, 100% heterosexual.

Ahh... gotcha! April Fool's!! :-)

Anonymous said...

Hahaha. Nice one Keith. I see you already fooled at least one of your HPers. Probably a proud homedebtor.

DOPES!!

Rom said...

G*DDamn April Fools Day!

Anonymous said...

I knew it was a joke the minute you mentioned someone would be held responsible.

you see, in modern america, you are all victims.

get used to it.

Anonymous said...

Haha... You got me, Keith.

Well I'm at least I'm not alone... the last 6 years have been an April Fool's joke by Bush, Cheney, Halliburton, and the NAR on the whole U.S. and the rest of the world.

Noodles McSpleen said...

Won't get fooled again....no,no,no,no,noooooo...

Anonymous said...

I am so upset that this was just a joke

Anonymous said...

Weak.

Anonymous said...

Dammit I wish this wasn't a joke.

Anonymous said...

Keith,

I remember the post from 1 year about David Lereah. As the old saying goes, "Fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again"

Anonymous said...

Lirpa Loof, what an odd sounding name. What could it possibly mean? :-)

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately...April Fools.

condosleazy price said...

Hahaha ... I almost forgot.

The Orange one will be the real Teflon Don.

Anonymous said...

I was so happy reading that post .I called my hubby at work lol then my bubble burst . I gotta call him back hehe Happy April fool's day

Out at the peak said...

You always have the best April Fool's posts.

Anonymous said...

It's about time he Mozillo was arrested. Awesome news.

Anonymous said...

You had me until Lawrene Yun was quoted. I knew that would be the most unimaginable height of hypocrasy to ever be true.

Imelda said...

Yeah I got that once Yun started "talking" I hate today because you cant believe anything you read.

Metroplexual said...

It took me until the third sentence to figure it out. BTW my 7 YO daughter was putting kick me signs on everyone this morning so I was prepped.

Anonymous said...

Good one. Real good one. What if it did really happen today?

Mammoth said...

Ha ha, good one Keith.

My favorite April Fool's prank is to call my employer from an outside line and to say:

"I am trying to reach [insert manager's name]. Please page [manager] and tell him to call Mike Hunt from [important customer's name]."

After the secretary makes the announcement over the PA system, half of the guys in this cubicle farm are always rolling on the floor laughing; the rest of them, who don't get it, are probably FB's.

-Mammoth

Anonymous said...

"The arrest of Angelo Mozilo if true is the beginning of the end for the corrupt Real Estate Industrial Complex" said NAR Chief Economist Lawrence Yun

Ha Ha Ha Ha !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Isn't this the pot calling the kettle black.

Anonymous said...

APRIL FOOLS!

Malcolm said...

good job fooling the crowd.

I guess mine was too over the top for anyone to be seriously fooled.

Hmm.. what's not to believe about Dick Cheney suffering freezer burn??

http://malcolmrant.blogspot.com/2008/04/nancy-pelosi-sworn-in-as-44th-president.html

Anonymous said...

BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA

BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA

markets soaring once again today...have fun with the 2% CDs losers

congress set to vote on bailout this week...have fun renting while Uncle Sam subsidizes my mortgage

some days I truly do feel sorry for you twits

Anonymous said...

Happy April Fools Day!


What a great day to have a sucker's rally!

Go DOW Go!!

Anonymous said...

Cities can't pay police. Now that is a problem.

http://www.usatoday.com/printedition/news/20080331/a_civiliancops31.art.htm

Anonymous said...

You had me going until I read this line:

"The arrest of Angelo Mozilo if true is the beginning of the end for the corrupt Real Estate Industrial Complex" said NAR Chief Economist Lawrence Yun

Lady Di said...

We can only dream.

brokersleaveyoubroke said...

Damn, you had me until I started to read the lawrence Yun quote. It's easy to believe Mozillo getting arrested but impossible to believe that Lawrence Yun would tell the truth.

Buzz Saw said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Buzz Saw said...

Damn, April Fools? Too early still.

corvinus said...

Yup, April Fool's, but... I can feel the bird's wings fluttering in the air. You may have given us the flash several months too early.

However, I don't think TCLY would ever say anything like *that* in a million years.

Anonymous said...

Hey mammoth, I can't believe the receptionist is dumb enough to fall for that old line. There's always Mike Oxlong if she catches on though.

You are less than 20 years old I take it? Your amusement with your pranks will turn to wonder at how you wasted so much time in your youth.

Paul E. Math said...

Anybody remember Keith's April fool's joke last year? I do, because it was strangely prophetic. He predicted that David Lereah would resign as chief economist of the NAR. It was a month or so later that he actually did resign. Maybe we'll be just as lucky with this one.

Anonymous said...

That is sooooo rude! I had called both my brother and sister ( all of us in the mortgage industry until 3 months ago) with the news.

Best April Fools Joke ever!
Now I have to call both back. What a waste of my morning. ha

X-er said...

You had me for the first paragraph and then I said wait a minute, hovered over the link....


To think I was really happy for a minute there too.

Anonymous said...

Mozilo's the poster boy for Bushonomics.

Where organized crime has carte blanche to rip off anybody at anytime.

A Kleptocracy on steroids...

DOPES said...

SO THE GUBERMINT HAS A NEW CREATURE IN THEIR FEDERAL PEN...

A SUB-PRIMATE NO LESS...

THE VORACIOUS ORANGE MOZILA...

LONG FEARED BECAUSE OF HIS ABILITY TO CONSUME 10 AFRICAN FAMILIES PER DAY, THIS ONE MUST HAVE STRAYED FROM HIS NATIVE WALL STREET HABITAT INTO THE CITIES OF AMERICA...

PROBABLY DUE TO HIS AGE, LOW INTEREST RATES, AND OVER-DEVELOPMENT IN HIS TERRITORY...

THE THICK, LEATHERY LINES OF HIS FACE REVEAL HIS PAMPERED YEARS IN THE JUNGLE...

SUCH A PATHETIC ENDING FOR SUCH A CREATURE THAT MUST HAVE ONCE BEEN KING...

BUT ALAS, THE GUBERMINT COULDN'T ALLOW HIM TO CONTINUE EATING THE NATIVES DURING AN ELECTION YEAR...

VIEW HIM WHILE YOU CAN CHILDREN, FOR SUCH
CREATURES SELDOM LAST LONG IN CAPTIVITY...

Anonymous said...

April's Fool?

Anonymous said...

Just like the fake rally today, another April's Fool.

Huge nosedive follows up to fleece the sheep.

Anonymous said...

congress set to vote on bailout this week...have fun renting while Uncle Sam subsidizes my mortgage


Which mortgage? You foreclosed long time ago and the S&P is down 14% for the year.

Anonymous said...

FUX NEWS FLUSH!!

Mozilo to receive Medal of Freedom!

Bush will present the award to Mr. Mozilo in the newly renovated Jeff Gannon Media Room adjacent to the Rose Garden.

Countrywide employees will serve refreshments following the ceremony: Kool-Aid, fudge and all-you-can-eat Texas-style Rocky Mtn Oysters.

Anonymous said...

This is the first step of the bailout - Have a few high-profile arrests & trials (Enron & Ken Lay come to mind).

Meanwhile, while you are all looking at the left hand, the right is bailing out the Wall Street clowns who assisted this, and also the liars who took loans they'd likely never be able to pay back.

And guess who's going to pay for it? YOU. That's right. YOU, who acted responsibly, have a manageable mortgage, pay your taxes, and act like a responsible citizen. YOU will fund this train wreck, receiving no benefit from it whatsoever.

No wonder I know more than a few people with assets considering leaving this train wreck.

gt said...

you know how they say every day is mother's day? well it's feeling like every day is april fool's. but i guess it's fitting in the land of sheeple.

groundhog day every morning i wake up!

viva la revolucione!

Anonymous said...

'Texas-style Rocky Mtn Oysters'

More likely Brokeback Ribs..

suzanne said...

I hope they have coed facilities so I can snuggle with angelo!!!!

Anonymous said...

You're a fucking looser Keith.

You are JUST AS WORTHLESS as the REALTORS and Mtg Brokers that you criticize. You have ridden the real estate wave just as they did; only you did so with your lame blog.

Your blog has run its course. Enjoy watching the web hits dwindle and joining the ‘has been’ pack of Mtg Brokers & Realtors.

Anonymous said...

'd also like to emphasize that I am straight as an arrow, 100% heterosexual.

Ahh... gotcha! April Fool's!! :-)

---

MARICON

Peter T said...

Keith, you fooled me - I wanted to write an approving comment, but someone had already made the connection to the date - it would have been nice.

Anonymous said...

cAin'T gEt FoOlEd AgIN!

Anonymous said...

Bah. I'm sure Mozilo, if he read this, wouldn't think it's sooooo funny. The rich love to sue, don't ya know.

Anonymous said...

I would not doubt it, McCain said on Letterman "The CEO of Countrywide has done
really bad things and should not be allowed to leave with stock worth millions.

oopsss someone is holding the bag, the orange guy.