December 20, 2007

Here's another hilarious condo development in Scottsdale Arizona - "The Mark" - where 2-bedroom dorms are going for $900,000 (cheese not included)


I don't think they could've picked a funnier name. "The Mark" is always "The Sucker" right? In a three-card monty game, "The Mark" is the unsuspecting fool about to get his wallet lifted. "The Mark" is the set-up in a rigged poker game.

Well, in Scottsdale, "The Mark" is anyone stupid enough to spend $900,000 or more for a Toll Brothers apartment in a fake REIC town where real estate is crashing fast and furious.

A 2-bedroom unit might be able to fetch $1500 a month in rent. That'll just barely cover the condo association fees, expenses and taxes on one of these gems. The $6,000+ a month payment - that's yours to eat.

What were they thinking people? What were they thinking?

I did a quick count and 16 of the 58 units on their website are showing "SOLD!", and you just know that all 16 of those fools are gonna cancel if they can. NO WAY anyone is stupid enough to go through with their sale. Much better off walking away from the deposit, and buying at the foreclosure sale if they really want to live there.

Oh, check out the splashy marketing website too. Massages, babes at the pool, art galleries, and of course wine and cheese. Yup, that's worth $900,000. What a joke. Here's a hint - rent one, and you'll have enough money left over to buy all the cheese you want!

48 comments:

Andrew Hac said...

Screw the cheese. I want the massage and the babe. Oh, about the condo, it's for chump. I am a real man, I want my feet to touch the land, not some half-ass, half-way shitty room in the sky.

Anonymous said...

I particularly like the list of amenities:

Amenities: Common Space, Condominiums, Pool

Wow, so condos in a condo complex are an amenitiy? Wow, they also have common space! I hear they have free air and sunlight too!!

Debbie B said...

Man, that is just so ridiculous. I think of all the places I could live the good life for $900,000. Why in the hell would I choose Scottsdale?!? Must be for the culture. Give me a fricken break.

Rom said...

Are there enough Canucks to buy these? I love the photo with the old guy and two hot girls. Do the HOA fees include hookers?

Carol said...

Holy cow (no pun intended)! If the market for condos is flat and AZ is one of the worst depreciating areas right now, why are they building a development like this? Do you think they'll eventually sell as BOGOs? If the price is right, I'd love to buy--no landscaping/maintenance, no separate hazard insurance policy, new property, amenities, no water bill (generally) when it's vacant. I bet the HOA fee on this one is a killer, though. Maybe Toll Brothers needs a bigger right off than they're already getting.

"Overcoming Real Estate Losses"
http://WhineCountryRealEstate.blogspot.com/

ForeclosureBoy said...

Those apartments are the perfect spot from which to ENJOY THE DIEOFF!

dieoff.com

(its fun being the first poster to mention the 'dieoff')

Silex said...

Follow the $900,000 link, scroll down to where it says

Important Features :
• Upscale Urban Luxury Living
• Beautiful Condominiums
• Convenient Scottsdale Location
• Close to Shopping, Dining and Hotel Valley Ho


Hmmmm. Do you think Toll Brothers might consider giving Valley Ho coupons to its marks?

Frank@Scottsdale-Sucks.com said...

LMFAO!!!!

When I left Scottsdale in February, 2007, I was paying $1,500 for a 3-br, 2,000 square foot luxury condo at Kierlend.

And these clowns think they'll get THESE prices???

That $1,500 rental is now going for around $1,200. I guess a 2-bedroom in this complex will rent for around $900 based on market conditions??

keith said...

How are these $900,000 dorm rooms doing? Let's ask Bob Toll:

"We can't tell, except the season should be starting now. Arizona is an F. Vegas has its own special category along with Tampa. It's got an F-minus-minus. Reno is an F. Colorado was a C-minus. The fact that I differentiate between, I don't think there were any F-pluses."

http://www.alleyinsider.com/2007/11/homebuilder-bla.html

Anonymous said...

Looks like a perfect place for a genius failed investor* to raise 5 or 6 kids and hide out from the IRS and process servers... No Money Down and 100% financing, of course. Pricing is irrelevant.

Just do a 'conversion' later. Convert into one giant prison by putting locks on the doors and bars on the windows. Bars on the windows so when the guilty conscience eventually catches up you are refrained from jumping to your death to escape the guilt...

*Your Reckoning and Private Hell is coming towards you like a Freight Train at Full Speed.

You will wish you were run over by a Buick driven by an illegal alien when you were six years old befor it is over...

Just trying to help...


Sick and Dying America

Jethrow said...

The Mark is ├╝bercool.

I love the art - Those pieces are from the famous Gorilla Kipoo. They were featured on 60 minutes a while back. Aparrently the Gorilla was taught to spread colorful paint on the canvas. That now sells for thousands at the Mark gallery.

Next would be the sexy pool babe waving to her drowning husband who is clearly underwater in the Mark pool.

Last I love the "Some look in the desert and see a mirage, we see the Mark."

Pack up the model T we're headed to the Mark as in "Markt 2 Market".

Muskrat Love said...

Well at least they have a brothel

Hotel Valley Ho!


Tally Ho, I'm off to enjoy the amenities at Vally Ho Hotel!!!


Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas to everyone on this blog even those of you that think I'm a moron!

happy homeowner in the stix said...

So, do the massages come with happy endings? Or is that not included with the HOA fee?

_______________

Yes, there is a Valley Ho resort in Snottsdale. It still makes me smile to know that a backstabbing slut I used to know married my ex-fiance there a while back. "Valley Ho" indeed!

Anonymous said...

Hilariously, the lead line on the flash intro says "In the desert, people see what they wish for and call it a mirage..." WHAT A PERFECT INTRO for a complex that will make a mirage out of your money!

doggy style said...

But jenna jameson and mike tyson live there.This makes the condos worth 900k in my mind.I get the chance to see broken down celebrities roaming around in snobbsdale.I am going to catch a flight today and make an offer.I love scottsdale.

Anonymous said...

Only $900K,fuck I better buy before I get priced out.

Keyser Soze said...

I officially offer $100/ sq ft for the 2400 square foot dorm room.
I researched it.

Anonymous said...

I expect those kinds of prices in Manhattan or London, not the desert. I guess $1 million isn't what it used to be.

consultant said...

There probably still is a toxic loan or two that someone will get to "buy" one of these units. But in the face of what we know, the whole thing is absurd.

I'd really like to know exactly "who" is buying this stuff now. Domestic gangsters without a clue, foreign fools (individuals, funds or states), airhead, trust fund babies, who, who??

Your Jewish Master said...

Hey, let's not forget the Westward Ho!

This is what places like The Mark turn into in Arizona!

http://tinyurl.com/26s3pd

http://tinyurl.com/297hgq

http://tinyurl.com/yuvgq5

Anonymous said...

At least you'll have peace and quiet. Perhaps The Mark's slogan should be: No neighbors make good neighbors.

-CalisGone

Anonymous said...

understand why only one out of a hundred "houses" are selling at the banks forclosure sale auctions and then only at more than half "value"

Anonymous said...

The Hotel Valley Ho, is that located in Nappy Valley?

Anonymous said...

Excellent picture of the rising sun through the smog. You even get a rooftop pool, just so you could be a little closer to the frickin' searing sun of Scottsdale in August. Anyone who bought is proof of the greater fool theory.

Frank@Scottsdale-Sucks.com said...

I love the photo with the old guy and two hot girls. Do the HOA fees include hookers?

LOL, been to Scottsdale in the last year? All the hot girls packed up and left.

But jenna jameson and mike tyson live there.

And even THEY have left! Yes, Scottsdale has sunk even below their level!!

The Hotel Valley Ho, is that located in Nappy Valley?

Actually, yes, that would accurately describe that part of town....

stuckinthecity said...

at most only 1/2 of those 16 will bail. the other really are that stupid.

eric in vegas said...

"Vegas has its own special category along with Tampa. It's got an F-minus-minus."

I always laugh when I hear someone in my family or a dope realtor claim Vegas is going to rebound next year when 4,000 new mcjobs are created.

Anonymous said...

What "The Chump" was taken?

Anonymous said...

In this case, The Mark is going to be the bank that loaned the money for this disaster of a project. I'm sure the developer/CEO has paid himself very well from the bank's coffers.

Anonymous said...

Check this out. Maybe this will make the $900K asking price worth it:
http://www.decadesusa.com/

PoliticallyIncontinent said...

So I checked out TheMark website and saw only white people in the pictures. What does that mean?

Anonymous said...

Consultant- apparently Carol. Oh wait...you have to have MONEY now in order to "invest".

Carol Carol Carol. Amway, worm castings, and then failure in real estate investing. Honey, please stop. Get off the computer and go take care of your home and children. (if you are even a real person)

Go read Proverbs! "Those who hasten to become rich shall not go unpunished", "A foolish man devours all he has". It's not the "business", dear, it's you. Tell your husband to get a real job and work live within your means (everyone respects stay at home moms who do this) or you will destroy your family with your own hands.

Anonymous said...

Wow. I thought the DC area was bad. That is utterly ridiculous.

Anonymous said...

$900,000? Try $200,000 soon

Anonymous said...

But jenna jameson and mike tyson live there.

---

Jenna Jameson lives in Las Vegas.

tater said...

Yep! I'm gonna get me one of these here $900,000 condos. I'll simply take my credit card, and borrow the $8000 for the payment and fees for the first month. Then, when the next month rolls around, i'll just write 'em a bouncing check. I figure that I can get 4 months out of 'em before they finally FORCE me out the door. But, they better be nice to me, cause if they ain't, I am gonna piss in their fancy ice machine. "No, ladies and gentlemen, that ain't lemonade in your glass!" Cheers!!

Anonymous said...

The opportunity cost on $900,000 is $4,500 per month. Add another $2,000 per month for fees and taxes, and you take a loss of $5,000 per month over renting. But if you think that the condos will appreciate at least 7% per year net of transaction costs you would break even. This explains why someone would buy it. They think 7% per year should be easy to get over the long term. But the current market is headed down, so why not wait and buy it for at least a half million less within two years? Even if you were planning to live there a long time to gain the 7%, you might still end up living in a most empty complex, a breeding ground for criminal squatters.

Now we see how the developer prices these things. He assumes that the buyers assume at least 7% appreciation. See he is selling investments, not living space. This is the heart of our current problem.

Anonymous said...

You will wish you were run over by a Buick driven by an illegal alien when you were six years old befor it is over...

LMAO

Almost as good as:

They will be burning the telephone poles to keep warm. or They will be drinking dog piss out of rusty hub caps...

Anonymous said...

So I checked out TheMark website and saw only white people in the pictures. What does that mean?

They are Republicans.

OC Slacker from 05 Housing Loot said...

1 Bedroom + Den - $474,575
Bedrooms : 1
Bathrooms : 2
1/2 Baths : 0 Sq. Ft : 1257
Master Bedroom : 1st Floor

are they fricken kidding? at the peak of the bubble 475K would have gotten you a nice unattached house in north county san Diego with at least 1400 sq feet. Who is stupid enough to accept 100 degree + desert wasteland with a real estate economy for this insane price.Now that SD home is being auctioned off in the low 300's and Scottsdale is still this expensive?????? W....T.....F!!!!!

OC Slacker from 05 Housing Loot said...

read in neighborhood section notice "FBR Open" fuct borrower open houses they'll be having

Anonymous said...

100,000 max, as govt affordable housing with a property tax at 5 percent..... and assiciative attempting politics to restrain expenses,.....

aikanae2 said...

Oh but why stop at the Mark. Scottsdale is building an entire Ghost City, starting with downtown.

Anonymous said...

lets see ...i buy one if these govt housing there at 50,000 and i average my million dollar hpuse and break even at .......... 27 years

Anonymous said...

could sell billions at 50,000 and cheap financing.

Anonymous said...

Wait a second!

They named it "The Mark"?

As in the phrase con artists use to refer to the suckers they steal or dupe money from?

That's Rich.

OC Slacker from 05 Housing Loot said...

these look like public housing with nice landscaping. They could give them to displaced new orleans citizens.

Ex-Wamu employee said...

"Jenna Jameson lives in Las Vegas."

Correct. The porn producer she was married to lived in Scottsdale, but they are divorced and she now lives in Vegas and banging UFC fighters.