August 03, 2007

Our official HP troll ("DOPES") is quite possibly one of the dumbest people on the planet. What advice would you offer him?

Definitely my favorite troll of all time. The cluelessness, the naivete, it just oozes from his comments. Five stars!

Seriously, though, what advice do you have for DOPES!

Have at it...

42 comments:

pka4lif said...

He should start his own blog...Iamfacinglifeasadope.com He could make money off the traffic we send him for his bs story!

DrNo said...

Lick the sweat drippin...

Anonymous said...

Go long on WAMU.

Anonymous said...

It's very easy to be labeled a "troll" in a community like HP where groupthink is prevalent.

About 12 years ago as a computer science grad student I started messing around with the Linux operating system.

By the late 90s I was a young professional still active on various Linux online communities. It was the go-go years of the dot-com boom and all the Linux fanboys were predicting MS Windows' demise within years if not months.

This didn't match what I was witnessing as part of my job and whenever I pointed it out I was labeled the "troll" or the "idiot" that "didn't get it". I remember a particular thread where I mentioned that the Linux startups stock valuations were out of whack with their meager profits if any and the difficulty of making money with software whose license grants the user unlimited rights to copy and distribute the product free of charge. I obviously didn't "get it". It was a new paradigm after all :-)

Needless to say almost 10 years later my predictions turned out to be a lot more close to reality than the fanboys'. But no matter how much effort I put into crafting my messages, how well I laid out my reasoning and arguments I was up against a crowd of people that were hell bent on believing their own version of reality and who kept reassuring each other that they were right.

So sure, wait for the big implosion, get ready to buy houses for "pennies on the dollar", make arrangements to attend President Ron Paul's inauguration but please don't take offense if I don't join you.

Anonymous said...

Buy a couple of MacMansions...if he still has credit, which I sincerely doubt.

foreclosureboy said...

wow that linux anon better not be the dopes troll otherwise this thread is a buzzkill...

anyway......I GOT TICKETS FOR RON PAUL'S INAGURATION, WHO WANTSA GO!?!?!?!?! WOOOOOOOOOOOOT

RON PAUL!!!RON PAUL!!!RON PAUL!!!RON PAUL!!!

Anonymous said...

Hey Linux boy, you were right, Microsoft is not loosing market for Linux, it's loosing for Apple. Microsoft sucks! And yes, financial Armageddon is coming to a sheeple near you.

BTW, apples and oranges.

Anonymous said...

Oh yeahhh...

There a few things that are consistent about 'DOPE':

Cannot form more than one sentence.

Definately nothing there to backup his assertions. Doesn't want to get tripped up by his own ignorance by dealing with factual details, so he just snipes instead.

His? behaviour more like a single cell bacteria in sample dish. You shine light on it or shake the slide and it quivers and shakes in an uncoordinated way.

That's summarizes 'DOPE'S' entire ability to interact with the outside world.

Anonymous said...

To the anon who brought Apple into the discussion; you obviously didn't understand what i was getting at.

My post had nothing to do with the OS market but rather it was an attempt at showing how a close knit online community can create its own reality or dogma, how that community's members can strengthen each others' beliefs anf how easily the occasional dissenting opinion is dismissed.

Noprogram said...

I like "Dopes" in the same way I like road runner cartoons. Wile Coyote just zings off that cliff every time with the ACME rocket powered roller skates. It's simple but yet so brilliantly stupid that I have to laugh every time. So keep it coming Dopes, I love the show and wouldn't be the same without you. If only HP had sound effects....!?

Anonymous said...

No advice, I prefer the market take care of the likes of "DOPES"

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

Hey Linux boy, you were right, Microsoft is not loosing market for Linux, it's loosing for Apple. Microsoft sucks! And yes, financial Armageddon is coming to a sheeple near you.

BTW, apples and oranges.

August 03, 2007 7:38 AM


=========

Hey moron. Nobody is LOOSING anything to anybody. What has been lost is your ability to distinguish between the words LOSE and LOOSE.

Therefore you are the douche of the day.

yoski said...

Why just flip one?

Anonymous said...

Hey but I need a loan.

Anonymous said...

To all trolls.. when you are serving me a burger in a few years please be sure to tell me that you were a troll at one time.. i'll leave you the change so you can feed Ramen to you family... i reccomend sneaking a few frozen patties in your pocket before you leave work cause ramen does not contain much protein

Anonymous said...

"By the late 90s I was a young professional still active on various Linux online communities. It was the go-go years of the dot-com boom and all the Linux fanboys were predicting MS Windows' demise within years if not months"


You'd have to be pretty stupid to forecast the demise of Microsoft.

Your predictions, if I may call them that, could've been made by any 10 year old and are not at all akin to the housing meltdown.

In the future, Microsoft may get watered down, but that's about it.

Anonymous said...

A self-performed frontal labotomy with a butter knife...

Anonymous said...

He would have made a great Nazi rank and file member.

A person born a few decades too late.

Smug Bastard

DOPES said...

SO.
.
.
SOME CRASH, HUH?!
.
.
.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
.
.
DOPES!

burn baby burn said...

I know a guy that has an American Home Mortgage and he was so happy this morning. He thinks that since they went under he gets his home free and clean and does not have to pay anyone back. I congratulated him on his good fortune and went on my way.

Anonymous said...

I think the dude is schizophrenic.

Remember when the market was cratering last week and early this week and all of a sudden he comes out with comments like

"I was just yanking your chain. I'm waiting for this overheated economy to finally blow up too."

Then as soon as the market had one good day on Wednesday, he was right back to his old comments.

DOPES, I see this as a cry for help. Please seek professional counseling. You need some meds to control the mood swings.

Jymkata

Anonymous said...

I love that DOPES kid, he makes me laugh...

TM said...

I think Dopes liked to swat beehives with a stick when he was younger. You have to hand it to him; he can get the comments section jumping with as little as 5 words added to the mix.

He might be the most efficient troll I've seen. I salute him and his iPhone.

Anonymous said...

you morons do realize that it is possible for more than one person to post as DOPES right?

DOPES

See how easy it is?

Anonymous said...

"You'd have to be pretty stupid to forecast the demise of Microsoft."


Well hundreds of people did and still do. They believe it, and why shouldn't they? They participate in online communities where dozen of other people say the exact same thing and tell them they're right.


If you believe you're going to be able to buy houses for "pennies on the dollar" and if there are dozen of other people telling you how right you are, how likely are you to question your own assumptions?

turdly said...

Dumbass Cramer just had a melt down on tv. If he thinks his rants will get the fed to lower the rates he's goofy. What an actor. I haven't seen that much talent since Green Acres.

Anonymous said...

Definately nothing there to backup his assertions. Doesn't want to get tripped up by his own ignorance by dealing with factual details, so he just snipes instead.

Not true. Just the other day he backed up his assertion with the fact that iPhones were selling like hotcakes. And every day that the Dow is up he tells us about it, even if the Dow was down five times as much the day before.

SunsineRandy said...

DOPES is brilliant! Always right on... unlike you HPsheeple.

Take your right hand. Curl all fingers but the middle one. You get an "i-hand". I won't tell you what you can do with it.

You HP koolaide drinkers should pay more attention to DOPES. He tells it like it is! READ, WRITE, THINK. Don't be blind idiots!!

Your Friend,

keith said...

Note to the real DOPES - create a blogger account otherwise people will try to be you, scary as that seems

DOPES!

kitchenstove said...

My only advice for DOPES is to walk away. Just walk away DOPES. DOPES' situation can't get any worse than it already is, so DOPES should mail in the dunce cap and walk away.

Anonymous said...

DOPES makes sense every now and then. Believing everything Keith tells you is as dumb as believing nothing he tells you.

Anonymous said...

You, idiots! My sister who is a high school drop-out, exotic- dancer is intellectually more sophisticated than most of you morons.

Go get a life...

DOPES!

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

You, idiots! My sister who is a high school drop-out, exotic- dancer is intellectually more sophisticated than most of you morons.

Go get a life...

DOPES!

August 03, 2007 11:43 PM
----------
She's also a whore, what's your point?

Anonymous said...

dopes is a furry....

Anonymous said...

>>>Anonymous said...

You, idiots! My sister who is a high school drop-out, exotic- dancer is intellectually more sophisticated than most of you morons.<<<

post some pics please. is she still working the pole?

Anonymous said...

>>> SunsineRandy said...

DOPES is brilliant! Always right on... unlike you HPsheeple.

Take your right hand. Curl all fingers but the middle one. You get an "i-hand". I won't tell you what you can do with it.

You HP koolaide drinkers should pay more attention to DOPES. He tells it like it is! READ, WRITE, THINK. Don't be blind idiots!!

Your Friend,

August 03, 2007 9:03 PM <<<


oh go use your finger and your thumb and make the shape of a L on your forehead and standby .....idiot...

Anonymous said...

you can call dopes dick for short but not for long......

belchorama said...

"If you believe you're going to be able to buy houses for "pennies on the dollar" and if there are dozen of other people telling you how right you are, how likely are you to question your own assumptions?"

- - - - - - -

Hey, groupthink-accusation anon:

Why do you think this community exists? Because we didn't buy the groupthink that built this bubble. If groupthink bothers you, you should be a lot more disturbed by what's been coming out of the mainstream media the last few years than by what's on this blog. Until around Fall of last year, there was next to nothing from the major news distributors regarding the historic run-up in home prices that expressed an ounce of skepticism about the "new paradigm" of housing prices. In the rare instances that a skeptical viewpoint was expressed, it was without exception followed by the rosy predictions of a realtor, whose viewpoint was implicitly given much greater weighting by the inclusion of a trailing return for the local housing market. As someone who's been in the minority opinion, you should appreciate a community like this for its fostering of a minority opinion. Labeling this community as the groupthinkers is ironic and ass-backwards. Be smarter.

belchorama said...

------------------------------

You, idiots! My sister who is a high school drop-out, exotic- dancer is intellectually more sophisticated than most of you morons.

Go get a life...

DOPES!

----------------------------

If your sister was, in fact, more intellectually sophisticated than me, I think she would have seen through my lie, when I told her that I had only $20 on my person to pay her for "Greek style" sex, rather than her usual $40. As I was vigorously sodomizing her, I informed her of my lie, and she wept.

Not the DOPES guy said...

I love this blog... reading the comments by all you idiots makes my day. I laugh all the way to the bank. You guys seem to have a love affair with Ramen. Frankly most of my realtor buddies and I never eat that crap. Ruth's steakhouse for me.
Stock portfolio +14% ytd
Personal real estate sales +30% ytd
Personally held real estate up 7% ytd
CFAT on pesonally held investment real estate $36,029 through July

Love those renters, thank you all you HP renters for taking care of my family!

Yeah, I see ramen in my future! LOL, LOL, LOL...


DOPES!

turdly said...

I love this blog... reading the comments by all you idiots makes my day. I laugh all the way to the....

Liar
I might see the 30% increase in sales if you're a weak suck that only sold four houses last year and you've 'already' sold three this year, but other than that, get stuffed.

We're a fairly hard group to lie to. We're a little more divested than you can imagine.

If you had ever been there, I'm guessing you mean Ruth's Chris.

chris g said...

Not the dopes guy,

I'm taking a wild guess that your home region isn't anywhere near Cali or Florida. Otherwise the defnition of "screwed" will take on a whole new meaning for you very soon.