May 14, 2007

Fill in your own punchline

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

she looks very accredited. i hate all mortgage people except the mortgage babes.....the babes get a pass...

Anonymous said...

I'd let her research it

Anonymous said...

Strippers need something to do after 30

Anonymous said...

Dude looks like a lady

Morgan said...

I'm an accredited mortgage professional and I'll sleep with you if I get to do your loan.

I love the "put your equity to work for you" - as in put your equity to work going on vacation, paying for your Hummer, paying the minimum payments on your maxed credit cards, putting $25,000 in to a kitchen that won't earn you another dime on your house right now...

Thanks for my next Why I hate My industry Keith - you 'da man!

Benjamin Franklin said...

All sounded quite reasonable, until she launched into this part:

"Please remember, I work for you, and NOT the bank. Therefore, I work in YOUR best interests, and my services, from the initial consultation, to the signing of your mortgage, are FREE".

I know she's in B.C., but at least in most of these United States, that's a flat-out lie.

For one, brokers have absolutely no fiduciary responsibility to the borrowers, despite what we all may want to believe.

They DO have a responsibility to disclose all of their fees, including the fees that are 'hidden' (i.e. yield point spread, or the kick-back they get from the lender).

Presumably she's buying that cute little frilly top and black business suit by getting paid from SOMEONE, and you'd better believe it's coming from the pockets of the suckers who actually listen to her nonsense.

Anonymous said...

I knew there was something about the accent...Canadian.

Anonymous said...

I'm pre-qualified to ban* her.

keith said...

you guys here all those stories of people who got pre-approved (with subprime or toxic loans) that now their lender has gone belly up, and they can't close on their house?

Anonymous said...

I'd tap that... I mean my home equity.

Anonymous said...

Didn't I get a lapdance from you last year?

a.creampuff said...

Thank God she didn't pull her hair out at tax time.

Dominion lending indeed!

Anonymous said...

He's a profesinamal mortgage sthingamagiggy. I trust every word she says.

Anonymous said...

I want her to do a LONG, SLOW, research

Anonymous said...

I just came in my pants.

Anonymous said...

If my dog had a face like that, I'd shave his ass and walk him backwards.

Pop said...

She looks much better when her hair is covering half of her face. Pulling her hair back= dealbreaker.

"The most highly qualified mortgage professional today" = 2 weeks of very intense training.

Anonymous said...

She gave me a lap dance at club stretchmarks!

Anonymous said...

"Hi, Amber here from Pole Dance Mortgage Source. We bend over backward to please you!"

Actually, she is well spoken in addition to being fairly attractive. I like the little heart pendant.

Out at the peak said...

I shop the banks for the best rates; some have better kick backs for me than others by a wide margin, big boy.

Anonymous said...

Guess we can't blame her for the content, as it's a canned speech.

Here's another AMP (Kathy) from the same company delivering the exact same speech, with the same lame jokes (pulling hair out at tax season, no kidding, etc):

http://tinyurl.com/2ls8yw

Mouthpieces, with the cheesy gestures, without an original thought in those pretty little blonde heads....

Anonymous said...

Quoth Austin Powers...


"That's a MAN, baby!"

Anonymous said...

I thought it was going to be "Naked News" style.

Doktaire said...

People want to get paid large juicy commisions, and I keep hearing "This is the most expensive purchase anyone will ever make". It seems to me that is the basis for charging $30,000 for 10 hours of work. I will never use any of these dimwits, I think I can handle this oh so complicated procedure all by myself thanks.

You know what they say, Pigs get fed and Hogs get slaughtered.

Anonymous said...

Funny, you've got Johnny Cochran's photo just below her picture...

I can just picture old Johnny negotiating to get some of that fine white woman blonde tail at closing of his mortgage. He'd probably be in those pants by the end of business that day - go Johnny! I suppose those two would deserve one another.

Shakster said...

Yeah ,if your really horny,and drunk maybe a broker will do.Maybe not.She wasn't trying to sell a loan or something was she?