Just keep it clean for the kids...
November 10, 2006
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A time capsule of the greatest financial mania in the history of mankind, told in real-time by regular folks and patriots. May future generations better understand the madness of crowds, and how power and money corrupt.
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57 comments:
I'M SO HUNGRY!!
They said real estate never goes down!
Hi, I can't be bothered getting a real job. Let me leach off you selling your house by charging you 6% commission while basically I do nothing!!
I will bend over backwards to make this sale (really far)!
If I don't sell this house soon, I won't be able to get my nails done or fill up my suburban.
Hi,
I'm Bambi, *&^% Brothers # 1 home buying incentive package. I will um, come by your home everyday for 1 month after the sale is complete.
Everything is included. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink... know what I mean?
----
The long pants? Oh, carpet burns.
----
I said look at the perks not the perkies.
----
Clipboard? No, this is just my kneepad.
What is with this Stinker fellow?
I'd hit it! :)
I sold this house to my Mom and Dad in Peak Bubble. Their ARM is adjusting and their HELOC payment has doubled, so now I am listing it for them.
I got their new appraisal from Zillow because there are no recent sales in this neighborhood to comprise normal comps.
They are very proud of my business acumen, especially with only my GED.
This is just one of nine that I own.
One free house with every girl!
Please,Please help me make my house payment!
You want what ? That's disgusting ! but I'll think about it.
trust me; i've researched this and you can do it.
This place has gone up 300% in the last three years. Isn't that great? Think of the appreciation.
Is that Suzanne?
I make six firures a year doing absolutely nothing..... So, just who is the stupid one?
I'm smiling because the "home inspector" didn't find the foundation problems but the new anti-depressants help, too!
Suzanne pictured in front of an overpriced debt box with volumes of real estate research.
And here are the results of her RESEARCH:
"Lending turned insane. No documentation loans allowed lying about income on loans."
"Minimal down payments permitted 0% equity (100% loan to value) loans. Fully 25% of those who purchased with 0% down payments now have negative home equity in their properties, to make for an initial nightmare for first-time buyers, one never forgotten."
"Second mortgages were routinely granted to cover the down payments, so as to sidestep private mortgage insurance."
"Force fed appraisals approved the claimed values, or else the appraiser was cut out of the mainstream."
"Deceptive option ARM’s tricked people into forfeiting their excellent lovely low fixed rate mortgages, in favor of temporarily lower rates, lower monthly carrying costs, but with rising balance on loans. Now many such ARM deals are higher in rates than the forfeited old fixed loans."
"Refinances are much more costly, many over $10 thousand, whereas REFI’s costs used to be under $1000. New home builders have offered free cars, free swimming pools, and no payments for initial months. There was no end to the insanity."
So how about it big boy?
Wanna play house?
Because keith thinks children read this blog (????) I'm gonna type in super secret sign language. (beware!! lots of swearing and porn)
!@&&^%##%^*&^&*&^*(@#!@@$%#%$^$%&%$^&@&%^*%^%$^$%%@%$%#$^$%&^&(*^*&$^#$$%@#$%#@$%#$^$%^$%%$&%^&&^%#@%$@%%$$#^#^#%$$%&$%&$%&$%$
and then she
@#$#@$^$%&%&(&*)&#$#%@#$@!#$@$%^#%%#@#$@#$%#$%#%$$&%**%^&$#%$%@%$##$@$#!@#@#$@#%$@#@%@#$%@#$%#$#$%$#$%@#%@#$%@%@#$%@#$%@#$%@$%@#%%#
and then he knealed down and
#@%$@#$%^#$%&%^*^&*)&**$%@#$@!#$%@$#^%#%&$%&^#$%@#$!@#!@$@#%#$^$%&%&#$$%@#%$@#%@#$#%^$%&$&#$%^#@%@#!@!@##%@#%^$^#$&&%#%%^#%^$%&$%&$%^#$%@#$!@$!#@$!@#@#%@#$%#^#%$^#^$^#$^$^
disgusting!!
P.s. If you want the super scret sign language code breaker just send $9.95 to striker at p.o. box 555 new brighton conn 55678
(must be 18yrs old)
I know a female real estate -in So. CA-agent who (as a token of her appreciation) would give her Ou$$y to her buyer (no matter if he is married or not)after the close of the escrow. Nice, Huh?
I'll take her anyday of the week
What, not listed by a real estate broker? The sign is just "For Sale" so I can assume "By Owner"? She looks smart enought to sell without an agent.
I'm gonna be the next Apprentice!
"Hi! Wanna buy a AWESOME house??? It has AWESOME granite countertops, AWESOME Pergo flooring throughout, and it's in a AWESOME neighborhood. I just got my license this year, and being a realtor is just... AWESOME (attempts a high-five, but misses)!!!"
come in and i show u what's inside? u gonna like it. round countertop and granite a$$.
All sales include a "Happy ending".
"Hi, I'm Buffy!"
"Let's go in the house and shag!"
Yes! You too can, like, buy a mammoth house you can’t really afford with, like, a mammoth loan that you don’t really understand!
And don’t worry - when you go under, the government will, like, bail you out with the proceeds going to America’s mammoth debt.
This weekend only, free friend with benefits with every home purchase.
Dees my sister. She number 4 broker in all Kazakstan.
Well Mr. Jones. How would you like to "get into" this? We'll bend over forwards to make sure I don't "blow this job" as a realtor. This is a "big house" but I'm sure you can "fill it".
I can "open for you" a line of credit and "pop your bubble" just as soon as you "make a deposit".
If only women knew what we were thinking, they'd have to slap us but they'd be able to rule the world.
Jebus H Krist that "Iraqi Information Minister" David Lereah just put out a press release about more "now is a great time to buy".
I seriously feel like vomiting when I read stuff like this. How someone can blatantly lie while all the facts around them dispute their claims.
He must have low self esteem to be doing a job he knows is based on spewing lies. He's like a manure salesman.
"Hiiii! My name is Candi with an 'i'. I'm from the bank! I'll be auctioning your house off today! Rocky over there will be helping you with tossing the furniture out. Say 'hi' Rocky! " [grunt]
"How do I look? Does my hair look okay?"
"Let me see the picture."
I title this picture: Desperate Times call for Desperate Measures
"If the market doesn't tank, I should be able to pay for my gender re-assignment surgery by next year!"
This chick is hot. A perfect Realtwhore peddling her wares.
Yummy!
First I'll screw you and then you can screw me!
Me give you 1.5 commission and me sucky sucky luv you long time.
After you buy this house, you can paint my face!
Guys wake up you sorry bunch if you think she is hot you must be real desperate.
Uhhh, we don't care. We just want to bang her, not marry her.
you guys are so durty, i dont know what yer righting, butt it sounds durty, im telling my mom.
and then keiths gonna get in trouble.
She looks pretty average to me, not that I would'nt do her.
That's hot college *ss.
This chick should find a rich guy while she's still hot. If she can't stay married well to the guy, at least she can get a lucrative divorce.
The lights are getting brighter
The radio is moaning
Calling to the dogs
There are still a few animals
Left out in the yard
But it's getting harder
To describe sailors
To the underfed
Tom
Thanks everyone for keeping it clean. I knew I could count on you
By the The DOORS
HUM_ i am afraid if you don't buy this house it will be beans and rice for a while. So do you want head or ass?
------
funny i can recall a certin relitive of yours asking me this same thing the other night.
huh deja vu!
It's, like, a new paradigm, and everybody who doesn't buy, now, will be priced out totally forever. Anybody who does buy will be rewarded with a lifetime of riches, as their property will continue its 50% yearly price increase.
Renters, and anybody born in a future generation, will not be able to afford a $10,000,000 starter home in 15 years. They will live in tent cities, and icky Hondas.
This asset bubble is different than all of the others - it will never slow down, or pop. The gains are totally permanent.
-RE.Agent
Does this house make my butt look big?
No, your butt is big.
the smart ones will start getting together the tools and programs necessary to liquidate and/or lease purchase the foreclosure inventories that are going to be exploding in the next few years...
as for the dumb ones...
well, the strip clubs are always looking for new disco dancing talent...
I wonder if she can pole dance?
Smug Bastard
"Si Julio you can jam 20 illegals in this house and have plenty of room in the garage for that meth. lab. Oh, will you give me a discount. I'm may have to go back to work at the bar with real estate slowing, and meth. sells well to all those unemployed construction types!"
I'd eat her ass.
Just bought this a month ago!
Now I'm flat backing it to make my payments!
Ooops, too late got to get out from under this derge!
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