I just had to - it gets better and better with age.. Suzanne researched this!
ha ha!
ba haha ha ha ha ha! ba ha ha ha ha ha!
Aaaahhh!! ba ha ha hah ha!
BAAAA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
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A time capsule of the greatest financial mania in the history of mankind, told in real-time by regular folks and patriots. May future generations better understand the madness of crowds, and how power and money corrupt.
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62 comments:
lmfao
I told you we couldn't afford this damn place!
But the realtor was told me that it was a good investment. I mean I thought real estate only went up in value.
THIS HOUSE OWNS US!
What do you mean?
It is now worth over $50k less than what we paid for it! We can't sell it with out going bankrupt.
Typical modern household, a sour-faced shrew woman and her fat, pussy-whipped husband.
After they get the house on an ARM, the payments adjust up and she gets stressed and starts using Prozac and reading self-help pop-psychology books.
Hubbie remains whipped, and tries even harder to promote her "self-esteem," but she just gets meaner.
Two years later, at a high school reunion, hubby meets an old flame who is a chain-smoking, divorced truck stop waitress, but she knows her place in life and is a lot nicer than the shrew.
So the couple get divorced. She, of course, get the kids, who are TV watching couch potatoes and don't know that Dad is gone until Christmas morning arrives.
Fat hubby moves into a double-wide with his new bride and they drink lite beer together and are happy.
The ex-wife doubles her Prozac dose and cuts her hair really short, becomming a "soccer mom femininist" who blamed the MALE real estate broker (Suzanne's boss) for all her woes in life.
The house goes into foreclosure and is sold to ANOTHER pussy-whipped wimp and his ugly wife.
..and the cycle continues...
he's putting out a hit on suzanne and the bi*ch right about now
I'm glad I have a positive net worth today. I will never get into debt like that again. It is the most miserable feelng in life worrying about paying your debts off.
Suzanne wouldn't lie ... Seriously.
You can have a positive net worth and have debt, what do these things have to do with each other? If your assets exceed your liabilities, then your net worth is positive. Where did you study accounting? At the special olympics?
You can have zero debt but have a negative net worth, for example, alimony payments are not a debt but are a liability.
I carry some 5.2 percent fixed rate mortgages on two homes that I own and rent out in a non-bubble area, which provides me with solid and positive cash flow. I also have enough money in the bank to pay off both of these houses if I want to, but why would I? Debt, used wisely, can be a very potent tool for financial success. That's why rich people have bankers.
Any loser living in an apartment (or car) can brag about having "no debt," but that doesn't mean they're financially successful. Being dumb and unsophisticated is not noble, it is low-grade.
Of course, millions of suckers will get wiped out by their bubble mortgages, but that's like blaming drunk driving on the beer.
My net worth is about $1.1 million, and I have about $277K in debt, and I like it that way. Money has been so cheap lately that if you know how to use it, then you should use it.
Here in San Diego, a guy talked to his accountant/financial advisor, to see how much he could afford on a home. He was told 1.2mil MAX. He purchased a home in a new developement for 1.4 about 2 1/2mos ago. With home prices and values flattening or declining. How screwed is this guy gonna be?
I have no idea how much he put down, just that he got in over his head from the start!
Hey Suzanne.....research this!
THE BIG LIE!
You can brag to this guy with no debt, but, I don't! Most people out there are still asleep. this guy will be one of the lucky ones who saw what was coming and changed his life in time. I too have assets of over 1,000,000 and no debt. I got there by taking risks like you did. Everyone who has gotten their debt down to zero today is on the right path.
10 years ago, after my devorce, I had 20 thousand in a 401k. I made half of my money in realestate, and the other half in stocks.
My hat's off to anyone who's bucket our cuture and set his life straight.
What! We can do this - what. Suzanne read David Lereah's book.
" That's why rich people have bankers."
bankers are rich people because they create money out of nothing, loan it out to homedebtors and have the nerve to charge interest!
There are lots of Suzannes out there and probably a lot of divorces will ensue be cause of them. How will couples split their finances with an upside down mortgage over their heads?
This is a classic. Recently home 'looking', actually asked by the listing agent, "Are u gonna buy?", meaning or am i just wasting my time. Then we were told they had another interested party who wanted to see the same property that afternoon. So my wife and I said, "well we had better let you go then", the realtor didn't know whether to
s--t or wind his watch! His cheezy games kinda caught up with him! :)
anon 5:36:46 PM
Where did I say I have debt you stpuid POS? I have all cash and no debt. I have an apartment and my expenses are $1,500/mo while my net income is $4,000/mo. I would say that is very successful.
What are your utility bills and insurance payments on your house? What happens to all your "wealth" if RE prices drop by 40% in your area?
Next time get all the facts before spouting your idiocy with such gusto
In 5 or so, the wife will start blaming her husband for the mess they got into. Then the husband will say; you b'tch, I was trying to explain then, but you kept on cutting me off by saying "what" - "what" and now you're f'cking blaming me? Go blame Suzanne!
"In 5 years or so..." is what I meant. Sorry for the typo.
1500 mer month rent, on debt, 4k per month income? Sounds good to me!
Having two rentals in a non bubble area? Sounds like the old (my area's different from all the others) I bet there both in Texas! LOL
Within a year, he'll have two sh%t holes that he can't rent out for the payments and be bleeding cash out of his savings. Real smart!!!!
Our the anonymous millionaire poster was told by his realtor that there was no bubble in his area. My guess is that he's full of manure and angry about buying in 2005. His rentals are probably paying for half his "non-bubble" mortgage. As we all know, there's never a bubble where we're living or own property.
This panty waist husband deserves everything bad that happens to him. If he doesn't have the set of nuts required to stand up to these puss then it is likely he is on his knees acting like a footstool during their coffee chats. Just prior to the strapon party when the rest of the neighbor girls come over and join in. He is a house bitch for sure. Pathetic!
I think Suzanne is acting in HER best interest: "If I get these suckers, I mean buyers, to buy this POS at full price, my commision check will hold me over for 3 weeks!!!!! Woo Hoo, no more dumpster diving for me, YEAH!
These commercial will top...eventually. Once the market comes into a full free-fall and melts down in bubblicious market.
-Dragasoni-
I got NO debt but my 1400 mortgage. My NET income is $5000 a month. I timed the market just right and bought in Sept 2003 AT THE RISE. My house would cost 1800 to rent out. I AM A GENIUS. F-YOU to the 2 anons that are boasting how the save by renting. Cheers from the REAL SLIM SHADY.
"Any loser living in an apartment (or car) can brag about having "no debt," but that doesn't mean they're financially successful. Being dumb and unsophisticated is not noble, it is low-grade."
To the brilliant investor above who owns two properties with debt, ever heard of the term liquidity?
Well... the wise renter (esp in bubble cities like NY, Boston, SF, LA, etc) has it and the one with two properties doesn't.
Now, as for borrowing cheap, I've done it for trading options but I close out every swing trade in a couple of weeks with minimal borrowing costs. Therefore, my principal's only tied up for a max 2-3 week rotation which puts me back in cash in a flash.
So, with that in mind, I earn $100K/yr from my day job, I average $40K/yr in trading tying up at most $10-20K at any given pt in time, and rent at $1300/month with no property taxes or condo fees. I sock away $60-70K per year for retirement, risking at most a $20K loss during a full blown market crash like an '87.
And since I have a big pool of savings, black monday's don't scare me.
So, I live in a 'bubble' city, rent, have $0 debt, and save tons of cash. I prefer this lifestyle to being a debt-bound homeowner anyday.
"Black Monday's don't scare me."
So, where do you keep your savings, under your mattress?
Keith,
Can you save this video clip and when the housing market hits bottom, add an audio making it appear that the husband is telling her wife - "I TOLD YOU SO?"
You guys don't get it. Those of us who rent and play the market after selling our houses have so much socked away in money market,short term CDs, and gold, don't fear a market crash. I play with about 70k and buy the dips. After I make a couple percent, I'm out. I've made 30k on trades this year and have almost 1,000,000 socket away making 4 to 5%. When the market does tumble, I'll still will be sitting safe.
Housing is toast. Where I live, the prices are dropping daily. You can't look at investments by the cost of your payment. In the city of Murrieta, about 45 miles from me, they're already down to 04 levels. How will you feel if they drop to 02 levels next year?
Just a thought.
great question about what happens to a couple who divorces but has to sell the house, and they're $100,000 in the hole after the sale
I guess they each get $50,000 in debt - community property?
All u debt free
"I got 1mill"
"I got 2 mill"
People
I hope ur armed and see around corners.
Ya know when people are suffering in america they tend to lash out and take stuff from them that have.
Beware.
All u debt free
"I got 1mill"
"I got 2 mill"
People
I hope ur armed and see around corners.
Ya know when people are suffering in america they tend to lash out and take stuff from them that have.
Beware.
I love it when the anonymous scared FB's come on the board making up stories about how rich they became. I dumped my home last summer to a FB like the one bragging here today. He now thinks that he's worth a million. I think I'll buy back from the sucker in two years at half price.
Ohhhhhh I'mmmmmm soooooo Scared! LOL
Those are the same people who bought into this whole housing risky sceam!!!!!!!!
I'll take my Mil. and hire a couple of guns.
What kind of moron would put someone down for paying off their debt? How do you know it wasn't high rate credit cards? How do you know they didn't just pay off their mortgage and can now retire worry-free? Just because someone is debt-free doesn't mean that they don't OWN their house. When you are paying off a mortgage, the BANK owns the house you are occupying until you pay it off. It's the same with a car or anything else. Until that title is in your hands and name, you don't own it.
And all the chicken-bullshit anons bragging about their wealth and income on the internet - nobody believes you or even cares. This blog is about all the morons who bought at the height of the RE bubble. If that's not you, then you have no reason to worry and attack people who didn't.
I'll take my 5 mil and hire more guns. Cheers from SNOOP DOGG to the SHADY FB
"I play with about 70k and buy the dips. After I make a couple percent, I'm out. I've made 30k on trades this year"
And that's my kinda fellow! A renter who's swing trades, part-time. Nothing beats that combination.
Makes me want to barf. Another reason I'm glad I'm gay!
I am a millionaire.
You should be glad your gay. Just think about all these flippers who are going to take it up the butt for the first time. You never know, Some of them might change teams.
Just kidding! You left yourself wide open for that one. LOL
To live like a millionaire requires about $11 M. An accomplishment, but is $1M real money anymore?
Why not go into a little more detail about how you amassed that fortune, so the rest of us can learn?
Are you doing anything for the betterment of humanity with all that net worth, or just sitting on your stack? What's that sound I hear? "Me preeeeeeecious...preh-shisssssss"
Bully for you, fat cats.
"You should be glad your gay. Just think about all these flippers who are going to take it up the butt for the first time. You never know, Some of them might change teams."
Dude, the heterosexual American male is forever pussywhipped. The days of a Burt Lancaster or a Gregory Peck type of existence is gone with the wind. Today's male is an androgynous automatron.
So, being gay is preferrable to being married to a CMHB (Castrating Men-Hating Bitch). Therefore, changing teams might prevent one from descending into a lifetime of servitude.
OK, I take it back. Do you feel better now????
LOL
Who's the fudgepacker? Is it the pretend millionaire?
Travelling down the Hershey Highway
That poor b'tch will not get anything if divorces him.
B*tch
HAHAHAHAH!
I stil can't believe that suzanne was ON SPEAKER PHONE THE WHOLE TIME!!
Hahahahahahahahahhahahahaha
The kindest interpretation of the benighted hubby is that this couple could easily afford the house. But then why did Suzanne need to do the "research"? And if that's the case, he's a stingy nay-saying ogre.
The Forever Pussywhipped American Male...
Is this the story of the post-era 70s?
I mean almost 90% of guys I know, in their 30s and 40s, are like these bozos who'll do anything to keep their spouses from driving them crazy. The 10% of renegades are either sports obsessed singles or jet setters who go to places like Rio or France for their trysts with the ladies.
You guys are cracking me up! If the Realtor in the Ad had been a Guy, would we be reading all these "B*TCH" comments? No way! It would just be "Oh, poor sucker, he was just doing his job" (and of course, the outcome of a bad purchase is still the wife's fault). As to the anonymous guy who wrote "The Forever Pussywhipped American Male" post... I am an American woman who lives in Europe precisely so that I can spend time with self-assured men who actually appreciate women and do not knock them senseless at every opportunity (can you say INSECURE??). Let's face it - the only thing new about the current Real Estate bust that's turning Average Joes into real Joe Schmoes is the fact that women are now in on the money-game instead of sitting on the sidelines as they have in the past. I guess this means that the dumb lunkheads now have twice as many predators to watch out for. Please, I beg you, stop blaming women for creating this mess...it's a cop-out!
"I can spend time with self-assured men who actually appreciate women and do not knock them senseless at every opportunity (can you say INSECURE??)."
Date the bad boys but marry the dependable guy. Isn't that a phrase from the self-assured woman's guide to dating? Hmm... point the mirror at the "INSECURE" banner.
I think the shoe, this time, is not on the guy's foot. I've done all my appreciating of women, during my 20s when I thought women were these sensitive, spiritual (into Buddhism or Shamanism), bootstrapping (see Kathryn Hepburn), Ivy educated (or seven sister, or state uni w/ full ride) type of sophisticated individuals working at a Salomon Smith Barney but instead, I'd discovered they were actually psychotic control freaks who did everything in their power to dispower men.
Yes, even my beloved biological sister mistreats her husband and he tolerates it indefinately because he doesn't believe in divorce (some sort of Catholic guilt trip). Well... he's in the hole today but is a workaholic who puts in 12hr days just to make her and the little one happy. Would I want his fate? Absolutely not! That's not a partnership but an indentured servitude lifestyle.
And this is not an isolated story.
So yeah, even if the realtor was a Sam (instead of Suzanne), I'd use the bitch label on the wife since she's still the progenitor of the problem. And Sam would simply be a boiler room sleezebag. Again, look at the "INSECURE" label because if I'd said the above at a social gathering, I'd get pummelled but if you said that 'All Men are dogs', you'd get a standing ovation at many parties. And BTW, I've heard the phrase 'All Men are dogs' many times throughout college, jobs in the work world, social clubs, spiritual, & meditation groups, you name it.
Funny. I guess it's all about one's perspective. I fear we are risking turning a housing blog into a relationship blog...but still I feel compelled to reply to your comment: "That's not a partnership but an indentured servitude lifestyle."
As someone who spent 6 troubling years married to a guy who nagged, harrassed, insulted and physically & mentally abused me simply because I had a decent job, good money-management skills and a slightly independent streak, I can tell you firsthand what it feels like to be enslaved. Turns out his beef was that my success made him feel he was not the man of the house despite earning double my salary. He even told my friends I shouldn't pursue the MBA I wanted because I wouldn't need it as his wife. THAT's what I meant by insecure.
In my experience, both men and women are equally good (and bad) at making financial decisions about homes & other personal investments. It's a matter of education, aptitude, interest and upbringing.
In a good partnership, a couple recognizes and plays to the others' strengths, vs. falling lock-step into "traditional" gender roles that may not suit their personalities. If they also communicate well they probably won't end up acting like, as you said, psycho control-freaks (see above - ex husband), because they will be comfortable with their arrangement and will both "know what they don't know" and when to seek outside advice.
I pity anyone, male or female, who is stuck in an out-of-balance relationship, because they probably WILL end up making stupid, emotionally charged money decisions (like going on shopping sprees when they feel attention starved) even if they are generally rational outside the home about financial matters.
The lesson I took from that ad is that the couple should have seen a good financial planner, because probably they needed an objective 3rd party (not Suzanne!) to help them decide if they could swing the property or not.
As for my ex - well, too bad for him. After we split I got that MBA, now earn 6 figures and travel the world. Had we stayed together, pooled our resources and continued investing well we could have retired at 50 and had the time of our lives enjoying our kids, volunteering & passionately pursuing our hobbies. Oh well.
BTW, despite my success, I haven't, to my knowledge castrated any guys yet (-; and I just may even give an American guy or two another shot at the title.
"BTW, despite my success, I haven't, to my knowledge castrated any guys yet and I just may even give an American guy or two another shot at the title."
Isn't it a question of 'need' than 'want'? Since you don't need one emotionally then the chances are that the 'want' will have a lower priority on your things to do in life roster. It's all about what's important to you and perhaps, marriage isn't one of them.
Research?? This was probably the extent of Suzanne's research: "Let me see... $750,000 times my 6% commission = $45,000 for me."
On a personal note:
I know a couple who moved from a good school district that had no "prestige" to a great school district WITH prestige for their kids.
They severely overpaid for their house and the kids are still doing as average as ever. I work with the guys wife and even she regrets that decision big time. Their house payments had doubled as have their taxes. Now they're struggling to find ways to put their kids through college if the scholarships don't come through.
There is no reasoning with someone who only hears what they want to hear. The culture has shifted so that guy started out behind the 8 ball from the get-go and his best course of action would be to start secretly planning an exit NOW.
As Patton once said, "a good plan executed today is better than a perfect plan executed tomorrow". Speaking as someone who narrowly escaped becoming a slave to a pookie princess mchouse myself, taking your nuts back and bailing out is about the only viable option. And no, the couch potatoe kids will not notice you are gone until Christmas.
"The culture has shifted so that guy started out behind the 8 ball from the get-go"
Yep, and the so called sensitive, enlightened women (perhaps 10-20% of the American female population) date a/o marry the 'bad' boys and end up becoming jaded by 29-31 but what the jaded ones have forgotten is how they'd overlooked the nice guys, back during the 18-22 age bracket, because they either didn't wear the right clothes or were too civilized for their wild side needs. Hence, the Puff Daddy vs Clark Kent story persists.
And now that we've all grown up, perhaps Clark Kent isn't the role model after all. Perhaps a globetrekking 007 or XXX/Vin Diesel is a better path which can lead to have one's personal power and enjoying what life has to offer.
...the cycle continues...
rolling and crying laughing soooo true. not just the ad and your post, how many sad sacks do you meet in life that are living through this hell - going along in an effort to get along but knowing at the same time they are flopping it over a stump and praying no one cuts it off! HA!
Being married myself I can see how this guy ended up with such a castrating beotch. They lure you with honey then turn rancid after they have you hooked with kids.
Yeah, did you hear they have two kids: 1 & 3 years old. Women just use the system(of laws)there is now way the guy could say no - she would leave him and have his money anyway.
Married men with kids are held ransom today in this society - they are like slaves. Child support and family law needs to be rewritten.
==="Now they're struggling to find ways to put their kids through college if the scholarships don't come through."===
Oh boy, is that common...
It's the old pitch, "Did you know that the elite XYZ h.s. had sent a dozen to Harvard and Yale and the top 30% to elite universities", but then what they don't tell you is that 1/2 of that top 30% doesn't get scholarships [Hint: Being less than top 5% from one's h.s. disqualifies many from merit based full rides so it then defaults to loans] so essentially it helps well off kids get into a school, like a Carnegie-Mellon or a Vanderbilt, that they might not have gotten into from a normal h.s. where top 10% is a requirement.
Yet, if your aspiring kid actually did all the work at a normal school and took all the SAT preps, thus finishing in the top 1% w/ 1450-1500 SAT, he might not only get into Washington U or Carnegie-Mellon but also attend free of charge.
Re: You said... "Isn't it a question of 'need' than 'want'? Since you don't need one emotionally then the chances are that the 'want' will have a lower priority on your things to do in life roster. It's all about what's important to you and perhaps, marriage isn't one of them."
Actually, the opposite. My needs are strictly emotional (companionship,comaraderie, a lifetime of shared giggles...) vs. financial! I'd be thrilled to be married, and I seriously wouldn't care if my husband earned far less than me - as long as he was happy & passionate about his vocation (ok, and reasonably good at it and was respected).
That's what I find seems to baffle so many American guys nowadays. Once they realize their lady doesn't need their paycheck, they get flustered because they're conditioned to be the breadwinner and they don't quite know how to just be a friend / lover. That's where many European men are somewhat different - in many European countries money is not the standard by which a man's status is measured, so the unspoken worry about whether they are being somehow 'emasculated' by their high-earning wives is not such an issue.
And, to stick up for my gender, I must say not ALL women are shrews who crack the whip over their hubbies' paychecks & the perks that come with it!
It's too bad, really, because emotional compatibility and income aren't always correlated. Sigh.
"Once they realize their lady doesn't need their paycheck, they get flustered because they're conditioned to be the breadwinner and they don't quite know how to just be a friend / lover."
Many guys have forgotten this after their 20s because of all the games, half-truths, and the faux spirituality during the time when one was suppose to meet these enlightened women in meditation classes.
I used to have lots of female friends (engineers, artists, medical professionals, business types) but few of them had evolved into relationships because despite the claims of spirituality, they were still into the Puff Daddies of the world. Unfortunately, after 29, a lot of that stuff wears thin so I really can't take any of these tall tales seriously anymore.
Now, some of them are coming around but I've completely lost interest in them. And just as predicted, they're pussywhipping their new fiances or hubbies. Hate to say it but these groups dynamics aren't very inspiring.
So dealing with someone as a friend is old hat. It's the vice versa that's the question.
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